How It All Began!
It was a summer evening, in 2015. Anthony and I were getting ready to go out to dinner with our pastor and his wife. We had been invited out for what we thought was just going to be an evening of fellowship. As we were picking out our clothes we were on a marital high, all that God had brought us through, as a married couple as well as parents. We talked about the sweet golden nuggets of wisdom that God had given us along the way. We marveled at all the growth that we acquired through some really difficult situations with one another, as well as with raising our children and with others as we navigated being a blended family. We pondered the question “What do you think God’s intention is for us to do with all that He has taught us and helped us to understand?” And the answer came to us plain as day — He wants us to share it with others. Then, we began to talk about how this could eventually be done. And to be honest, we were thinking about the distant future. We decided that we should write everything down and that one day, far off into the future, we may be able to put it all together in book form. I figured that The Lord would not have us speak on the subject of marriage and family until we have been married for many years (30+), and after we have finished raising our five daughters and have acquired all the wisdom we were able to throughout all of it. When we reflect on this, we think of God looking down on us with a knowing smile and a little chuckle, fully aware that He had already set in motion an opportunity for us to do just that — share what we had learned with others...
Later that evening, we arrived at the restaurant where we agreed to meet our pastor and first lady. We ordered our meals, and as we waited, our pastor told us that he was led to ask us to lead a marriage life group for our church. I literally lost my appetite! I mean, were they listening in on our conversation, in our bedroom?? I couldn’t believe God! I thought “For REAL?? Now???” I was caught completely off-guard, and did not know what to say! Do I say “Perfect! We were just discussing that before we got here! We’ll do it!” That sounded so presumptuous. But, we weren’t looking for anything. We weren’t thinking of ourselves as capable teachers or facilitators. At that point, neither of us had ever taught any kind of class before. So, we just gave the textbook Christian response, “We’ll pray about it and get back to you.” As the evening continued, the conversation did switch back to light fellowship as I just picked over my food. To those who know me, this is a sign of something being off, because I take delight in eating good food. And the plate that was before me offered just that: good food. After the eating — or whatever you call what I was doing — and conversation was done, we rose from the table and left the restaurant. Each couple getting in their separate vehicles and heading home. On the way home, Anthony and I analyzed the events of the evening, from us exploring how God would have us share what He has taught us, through an opportunity dropping right into our laps. We were both mystified as to how this could have all come together. But as we spoke about the situation, one thing was very apparent to us:
This was God’s doing.
And we knew better than to try and turn Him down. So we worshipped Him together for being so awesome, and for the opportunity to serve others in this capacity. And in that moment, we officially decided to agree to the request.
From there, we had to make decisions of how to conduct the group and what the vision would be, and what our resource would be. We decided very early that we should model Christian marriage behavior, so I would be careful to let my husband lead even in this. Not that I would never lead a discussion, but that I would be careful not to hog the floor (at that time my husband wasn’t as quick to talk as I was). We decided that the Bible would be our resource. Not that we don’t understand that there is a plethora of books and workbooks written with good, deep discussion material about marriage, it was just that we felt lead to examine the scriptures ourselves, and within our group, to see what The Lord would say to us. As we considered every decision we had to make, we talked them over with The Lord, and He blessed. We had good discussions in class about the elements of the marriage relationship, the way that God designed it, as opposed to how we tend to do it. Through what we read in the Bible, and through sharing with one another, God revealed things for us all to ponder. He challenged us to treat one another better in specific ways, and He helped us see things more from His viewpoint.
As we made our preparations every month for this group, we developed an even greater appreciation for how God created us, and how He has designed us to work in concert with one another. He has also given us a deeper desire to spread the truth that God’s design for marriage really does work!